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IN DEFENSE OF THE SNAIL

Writer's picture:  Brad Van Winkle Brad Van Winkle

Updated: Oct 29, 2022

Reconsider the gait of the snail

Stalely trailing along the ground

Its ilk, oft-maligned creatures

Such is the lot of a gastropod

Oddly plodding its way around

Without any limb-like features


And what more – saddled with a shell

On belly gel does it drudgingly glide

It neither romps nor frolics

Instead leaving the wake of its slime

Its timing stymied by the frame it’s supplied

So perseveres the staid mollusk


Surpassed by its cousin the slug

Who smugly chugged as it vainly gloated

Deriding the snail as molasses-y slow

“What you lack is ferocity

Your velocity lost steam as you locomoted

Your only potential is escargot”


But refrain from discounting this breed

Its speed impeded by a dearth of feet

Constrained to travel via gut

Imagine yourself in its place

Embracing a pace not so fleet

How swift a prone beeline could you cut?

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